The Value of Friendship
About ten years ago I began to form relationships with the most amazing women. It wasn’t planned,it just ‘happened’ and it was beautiful. One by one we came to know one another and, as we began to know one another we began to let ourselves be seen, really seen--seen like we knew we needed to be but, we were afraid of previously.
There are lots of reasons why we sometimes think we don’t need or don’t have time for friends. I think that most of us have been really hurt by our friends at some time or another. How is it that the people that we trust and are close to can hurt us so much? Have you ever heard the voice that says ‘don’t let them in, they’re just going to hurt you’? Or, do you tell yourself —just keep it light, don’t go deep, don’t let them see you?
I think that if we’re honest most of us have thought those very things. But, I also know that we weren’t ever meant to keep people out because we really were never meant to be alone. As much as we hate to admit it sometimes, we really need one another. We need to have friends who know us— the real us, the messy us, the imperfect and fully human us.
I was able to spend some time with those amazing friends last month. I hadn’t seen most of them for about a year. From the first moment we were together part of my heart came back to life. I was a mess emotionally and felt like I had been drug through the ringer. Because of my history with them, I was able to just let it all out. Everything that I had been holding inside, everything that I had been trying to keep together, everything just came to the surface and I let it.
And they leaned in to my mess with me. They listened and helped me sort through some things and were exactly what I needed! I spent about two and half weeks going to some of my favorite places and doing some of my favorite things with those amazing women. Each time we got together it was a refueling and reconnecting of our souls. We laughed together and cried together. We celebrated and we grieved. We watched chic flicks, we ate lots of yummy food, we hiked at some of our favorite spots and made so many new memories.
We shared our hearts and souls with all of the varying highs and lows and we cried when we had to say goodby. I never regret pushing through my fears and letting myself be fully known by them. I know them all well enough to know that they feel the same. Do we always agree on everything? No, we are all very strong women and have strong convictions about things. We actually love to delve in to some of the things we disagree about. We respect one another’s opinions. Do we ever have misunderstandings? Yes, of course we do. We work hard at working through them and staying connected as we process though.
I think that they would all agree that we place a high value on our friendship because it’s something that we’ve had to fight for, risk our hearts being hurt for and it’s something that we will do everything in our power to never lose.
What a gift their friendship is to me! It’s one of the best things in my life!
Who knows you—the real you? Who knows your deepest fears, your dreams, your passions?
What do you value most about the friendships you have?
What do you need to overcome to step out and be a friend to those who keep coming across your path?
