Loving Ourselves

The concept of loving ourselves an ever-evolving process. It can change from day to day and season to season and that’s perfectly normal.

Our mind, will and emotions are involved in everything we do. When one part is off it affects the other parts. If I wake up one day with a headache it affects how I think and also my emotions. It’s really hard for me to be cheery and super energized when my head is throbbing.

Sometimes I have difficult things going on with people in my life that I have relationships with and when that happens it affects my ability to focus on anything. I feel sluggish and sad.

Then there are days that the sun is shining and the birds are singing and I feel amazing and energized and I can’t wait to get out and face the day whatever it may bring.

How do we love ourselves where we are at every day? How do we embrace what’s going on in every area of our lives and not be overcome with what is going on around us? How do we have grace for ourselves to be okay with not being okay sometimes?

I wish there was a simple formula written in a book and I could go to chapter 1 to find out what to do when one of my friends moves away. Then there’s chapter 2 that tells me what to do when my dreams get shattered, and so on.

There are so many amazing books out there but, what I want to focus on today is learning how to love ourselves. Where am I at right now, in this moment, and what do I need? I believe that as we ask ourselves those questions that what we will gain will be priceless and life-changing.

What is your response when a friend asks you how you are? Are you able to to answer that question with an “I” statement? Or do you respond by saying something about someone or something else? Is my focus on getting other people to do what I want them to so they will make me happy? Or, is my focus on what I can do to take care of myself?

I was talking with a friend the other day about something and she asked me, “what do you need”? Thinking about my answer helped me get a new perspective and it helped me get back in my own yard. What I needed, or thought I needed probably wasn’t going to happen but, it helped me slow down and think of some things that I needed that were doable. That’s loving myself.

There’s a lot on my plate right now and it’s been occupying a lot of my time but, I knew I needed a break so, I got outside and took my dog for a walk. Then a friend called and invited me to go to dinner and a movie and I went. That’s loving myself.

Then, there are days when things aren’t okay and we get to navigate those feelings and have grace for ourselves to be able to do what we can and then let ourselves off the hook. That’s loving ourselves.

People who are able to love themselves well are able to love others well. We can’t give what we don’t have. It’s not selfish to be aware of your needs and do what you can to get your needs met. It’s actually very healthy to intentionally take care of yourself so that you are better equipped to take care of others.

What are some ways that you are currently loving yourself? What are some areas that you see that would benefit from loving yourself a bit more? I would love to hear your thoughts.